HELP!!! Im in love with my cousin.. now that she knows she keeps me at arms length.. n im planning my suicide?

PLEASE don't think about suicide. There's soooo many girls in the world that would LOVE to have you in their life. I don't know who you are, but you seem like you would treat a girl the way she deserves to be treated. You look at the small things about a girl, and that is EXACTLY what EVERY girl wants. Trust me, ending your life at such a young age when you've only experienced love once is not a good idea. You have so many more years ahead of you.. I'm only 21 and I've never been in love but I'm waiting for the right person just like you. You just need to have faith :)